The phone isn’t the problem. The addiction is. With so many distractions and endless voices pulling at our attention, those who learn to focus — truly focus — will rise above. Discipline is what we need to win this battle in the world world today.

If you want to lead well, love deeply, think clearly and live freely… you must fight the pull of phone addiction.

You don’t have to live constantly distracted, mentally scattered, or emotionally drained. Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control. — Proverbs 25:28

In the new book, The Anxious Generation, Jonathan Haidt outlines some sobering truths we all need to hear — especially parents and teens. These are real, researched and convicting:

Here are the “10 Wake-Up Calls from The Anxious Generation”:

  1. Our attention spans are shrinking. Screens are training our brains to crave constant stimulation.
  2. Social media is forming our identities. We are becoming who the algorithm rewards, not who God made us to be.
  3. More screen time = more anxiety and depression. This isn’t a guess—it’s the clearest trend in mental health research today.
  4. We are avoiding real life. Boredom, awkward moments, hard conversations — they build us. We are skipping them.
  5. Friendships are getting thinner. Deep connection is being replaced by shallow contact.
  6. We are stuck in constant comparison. Everyone loses in a game of filters and fake highlights. Our sleep is suffering. Our minds are paying.
  7. Devices in our bedrooms are robbing us of rest and resilience.
  8. Big Tech is hacking our dopamine. The goal is not to help us — it’s to keep us scrolling.
  9. Emotional resilience is fading. Without challenge, we grow fragile. And we are escaping every challenge. This is an untested experiment.
  10. No generation has ever lived like this, and we are only beginning to see the fallout.

What can we do?

We don’t need to live in fear, but we must live with intentionality. Here are a few simple, powerful steps that can reset your focus:

  • Set app time limits (and honor them).
  • Turn off non-essential notifications — only keep calendar, task reminders, and texts.
  • Never have your phone out at a meal — turn it face down or leave it in the car.
  • Keep your phone out of the bedroom — give your brain space to rest.
  • Practice being fully present — at dinner, in conversation, in worship.
  • Schedule screen-free hours — especially mornings and evenings.
  • Model what you want your kids to become — they are watching more than listening.

Scripture tells us in Romans 12 not to conform to the pattern of this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of your mind. In Hebrews 12:11 we find this sage advice: No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace.

Let’s reclaim focus. Let’s raise kids who are emotionally strong, relationally present, and spiritually grounded. Let’s live lives that aren’t ruled by screens.